It's hard to believe that Christmas is already here...
The sayings I post on Mondays each week are mostly "mine" of course they are often inspired by different people or authors over the years. I say that with great respect for the centuries of wisdom we stand on today - nothing is ever really "ours" or completely new. Sorry that was a fast digression....In "my" weekly sayings I typically like to connect or preview where I want to go with the week's Blog. If you saw this week's you'll remember I posted
"All we really have is now, may we use it wisely".
The idea of the "present" is on my mind these days which ties into other aspects like Time, the Moment, etc. we will explore them in future posts. But with Christmas upon us I'd like to focus on the "present". Obviously, the word can't help but remind us of "presents" that we give or get at Christmas. But that's not what I'm talking about. Don't get me wrong the giving and receiving at Christmas are 100% a part of our relationships and it is how we've been conditioned to show love at times like these. I dedicate a whole chapter to this in my 1st book coming soon! However, for now let's consider "presence"...
For many people this week is the last week of a conscious spiritual preparation for Christmas -Advent. I believe there is great wisdom in any traditions that encourage us to step back even for a moment from the daily run to reflect, remember, possibly even resist and to prepare.
Preparation, in my opinion is intimately connected to Presence.
Consider, all the things we prepare for in life like training for competitions, preparing lessons to teach, studying for exams, and the list goes on...Do we consistently put that kind of preparation into our relationships? I'm not saying you do or don't - just raising the question, always for myself as well. At this time of year how much do we prepare all the more though?...We start thinking of Christmas shopping right after Thanksgiving in Canada or Halloween, some people way earlier. People often take family Christmas photos earlier in the year to have time to send them out. We prepare our homes, the food, we clean, decorate, etc. etc. and all to celebrate one day - Christmas!
I mentioned the spiritual preparation because for many people Christmas is the celebration of God's choosing an intimate relationship with Humanity. Therefore the spiritual preparation makes sense to celebrate the presence of the Divine in our lives - whatever that may look like for you.
So how does this connect what I want to say about relationships this week again?
I am not down playing the level of thoughtfulness and generosity/excitement that often goes into Christmas. But I have come to believe personally that our "presence" or being "present" in our relationships is paramount over "things". I understand first hand that many things can prevent us from being actually physically present with our loved ones. Things like; work, distance, brokenness, I have experienced them all. For example, as you know I'm divorced so the holidays always bring up a challenge of how to best be present to my kids. Most of my extended family that I miss dearly live across the country so distance is also a constant issue for me - just to name a couple.
In this sense I believe practicing Presence in our relationships means we are talking about also being generous with the gifts of our Loyalty, Honestly, Trustworthiness, Compassion, Forgiveness, Attention, Affection, and so on. Well at least try our best that's all we can do.
So my own challenge personally is the same I offer you this week...
1. How am I preparing for Christmas - is it just about material things?
2. Do I prepare, work or invest for relationships like I do for days like Christmas?
2. What does Christmas really mean to me - does that impact how I celebrate?
3. How can I be most present to my loved ones, appreciate their presence in my life and how can I honour God/The Divine's ultimate Gift of presence in my life too?
I wish you all the most Blessed and Merry Christmas possible whatever your situation is.
I know the holidays can bring up many emotions for people - may you Prepare well knowing in advance what you have experienced the past & if need be try making new memories in the Present!
Sincerely,
KK.
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